THE FINAL LAIR OF THE APPARATUS
According to that SKETCHY LUMP with FLOWERS FOR TEETH, this place is the resting spot of an... APPARATUS. What even is the APPARATUS, anyways? You've been given no description, hints or clues as to what it could POSSIBLY be. In fact, why are you even LOOKING for that GREAT APPARATUS if you don't know what the WONDROUS APPARATUS is? Isn't that odd--isn't It odd that you aREN't lookIng for tHE MAJESTIC BLESSED APPARATUS?? WHY AREN'T Y- oH DEar. SometHING IS VERY WRONG HERE.

.....

THis place mAKES fOr A POOR GARDEN, beCAuSE thE SOIL Has BEen DUG UP SO FREqUENtlY. yOU HAVE TO DIG. YOU HAVE TO FIND THE ULTIMATE SUBLIME OMNIPOTENCE, MOST MAGNIFICENT APPARATUS OF ALL KNOWLEDGE, BEHOLDEN TO MINE HEART, SOLE HEIR OF MY DESTINY. WHERE IS IT. WHERE ART THOU?? WHERE HIDES THE ALL-ENCOMPASSING?? ? ??? ???? ?

...OH GOODNESS. IT Might be time to RUN AWAY now.